So, I’m coming up on 5,000 hits since I moved over to WordPress from Blogspot – 7,000+ before I moved over here. That’s over 12,000 peeks into my life. That’s a little disturbing.
My life isn’t all that exciting. It’s small and compact. I’m not well-off, but I have everything I need, and most things I want. I haven’t traveled extensively. I honestly don’t get out much. I’m not a hermit, but I’m not terribly social, either. No, my life is a series of fuckups interspersed with small triumphs. I’m awkward and raw. I learn by banging my head against the wall that banging your head against the wall hurts. I’m easily hurt, and just as easily amused.
I wonder sometimes if I “overshare” on this blog, but really, this is the tip of the iceberg. Believe it or not, I’m extremely cautious about what I put on here. I’m not here to ruin friendships, slam people, or destroy my career. I try to keep it positive. What I mostly try to do is observe the world around me and learn from it. I’m not spectacularly brilliant, but I am extremely observant and intuitive, and a good judge of character.
Having to put things in writing helps me clarify what I’m thinking about. As I mentioned somewhere back in another post, I’ve got several levels of written communication. This is only one. Second to my diary, which is where I file all my negativity (NOT good reading, believe me), this is about as honest as it gets. It’s honest, but far from complete.
I have to keep in mind sometimes that ANYONE can read this. It isn’t just available to my friends, but to my employer, my ex-husband, my enemies (okay, they’re not exactly legion, but they’re out there, believe me), my dad – anyone. I think sometimes we’re not as careful as we should be about what we toss out onto the internet. I know if I was in a position to hire someone, the first thing I would do would be to google them and look them up on facebook.
It’s weird to me, this age of facebook, blogs and twittering. All this has happened during my adult life. I didn’t grow up with it. I feel like a bit of a dinosaur at times. We all know what everyone else is thinking and doing at any given time. Remember going to the post office to pick up mail? And by the time you responded to a letter, the sender had moved on from that moment in time and was now onto something completely new and different. No longer.
I know too much stuff about people I hardly even know. I want to be careful about what they know about me, and so I’m constantly examining what I’m writing here. So why do I write for public consumption at all, that’s the question.