Twentieth Century Woman


Here’s some interesting stuff.  I’m a blogger, right?  So I should be quite tech-savvy, right?

You would be quite wrong, my friend. 

Interesting stuff about my relationship with technology:

I have no idea how to text.  All I do on my phone is talk, and I don’t even really like to do that so much.  I’m not a phone person. Very few people have my cel number.  If I want to take pictures, I have a perfectly nice camera.  If I want to go online, I have a computer.  All my phone has to do is be a phone.  When I actually have it turned on and remember to charge it, that is.  Last time I replaced my cel phone, I asked for the simplest one they had, no camera, nothing.  Turns out you can’t get what I want.  What a surprise.

I have never had a dishwasher.  Well, once, but it was a long time ago and we’ve been divorced since ’99.  I am a dishwasher, and perfectly happy to be one, so long as I have a window to look out of. 

I have a rotary dial telephone in my bedroom.  Works great.

I have my brother’s old Mister Coffee which he gave me, used, when I got divorced and lost the coffeemaker.  I think it’s from the 80s.  Mister Coffee has only one button.  No display of any kind.  All he does is make coffee.  That’s all he has to do.  I love him.  He does good work.

I’m still not sure what Twitter’s all about, or how it works. I DO have a facebook account, in fact, have had one since 2007, earlier than a lot of other people of my advanced years.  Mostly got it to keep track of my kids, honestly, but I get a lot of personal use out of it.  Tumblr – see Twitter.  No effin’ idea what that’s about.  Youtube – I use that a lot, yeah.  Don’t know how Netflix works.  I watch movies on DVD or pay-per-view. I still have vinyl records, and I do in fact still have a turntable.  Not because I’m a hipster, either. Because I’m OLD.  Does anyone remember Peter Dunn’s Vinyl Museum in TO?  That was an awesome place.

I do a lot of shopping online, mostly because I really don’t like malls.

I know how to darn socks, mend, hem, iron and sew on buttons.  I also spin my own yarn and knit.  I frequently do all of those things.  In the past, I made a lot of my own clothes.  I’d rather iron a natural fibre garment than sweat my ass off in polyester, any day.  Plastic has a place.  I’ve got lots of useful plastic things, but very few beautiful ones.  I love aged wood, leather, beaten silver, smooth stones.  The patina of age really speaks to me, stains and marks and scars.  Shiny new stuff bugs me until it’s worn in.  After that first scuff, you don’t have to worry about it any more.

I’ve never owned a brand new car, and probably never will.  I think it’s kind of a dumb thing to buy, actually.  If I buy the same car used in six months, it’s,like, half the price. I get attached to cars, and the more they have to be loved and coaxed to stay on the road, the more I love them.  I believe in spontaneous automobile healing.  That noise will stop by itself.  If not, turn the stereo up and let it feel the healing power of the Ramones.

Most of my clothes come from Value Village or the St. Vincent de Paul.  Except pants, I can never seem to get pants that fit right at vintage stores.  Also, I draw the line at undergarments.  I always want to be the first owner on those, thanks.

In highschool, I used to wear a cologne called VSP, by Jovan.  They don’t make it anymore.  I still remember the smell, and I’m still looking for something comparable, thirty years later. – apparently I’m not the only one. 

I don’t own any kind of e-reader.  Loves me a book, yes I do, a real cover-and-pages, paper-smelling, dog-eared, pencil-margined BOOK of a book.

I really don’t listen to much music later than the mid-80s, except some stuff my sons introduced me to. 

Sometimes I wonder how I function in this century at all.  I admire people who are tech-savvy and up to date, but I’m not one of them.  I can, however, make you a nice pair of socks.




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